Astoria, Oregon ~ January 24, 2013
Outside Columbia River Coffee Roasters
Yes, some of us need reminding. I'm still noticing small improvements that add up, but I'm waiting for the huge improvements. I did the math last night, and I honestly think my recovery was set back about a year because it took six months after the first surgery to get the second one. That means six more months of getting sick and six more months that I wasn't recovering. It's like driving an hour in the wrong direction. You lose the first hour, you lose the hour getting back to your starting point, and you lose the two hours you would have been driving in the right direction. I'm so mad about it, but at least I'm on the recovery road now. For some of us who were so incredibly sick before the surgery, this is unconscionable. These doctors were nice to me but I think they made mistakes. I will definitely tell them my opinion afterwards, though nicely. I reserve my greater fury for the doctor who had no clue when he saw the calcium test of 11.3 and would not send me to an endocrinologist. That was in 2004. Oh well, this was about recovery. I know it's here for all of us, but I know I would have had a quick recovery myself in 2004. I was still so very functional then.
I feel a bit like this bench. Waiting. Moss growing. Bicycle waiting. It's a bench for two, and yet it feels so lonely. The background is peaceful, but the real world waits outside the confines of the frame.
I was able to have coffee and visit for awhile with Barbara, Erika, and Laurel. I had fun playing with smiling Inga, still tiny with big blue eyes that sparkle fun. Teagan no longer knows me. We will see what happens with that.
1:30 p.m.: After my Reiki treatment with Angela, my feet gave me just a hint that, yes, they will someday take me places again. It was one of their better mornings. I remember the day - in between my two surgeries - when I was able to walk to the parking lot of Wells Fargo to hear music on Sunday Market day. It has not happened since, but it will happen again.